I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
