Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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