how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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