Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize