apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
