He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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