We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
