I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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