Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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