dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
