I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
