That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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