how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Randomize
