if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
