love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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