She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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