I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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