check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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