you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
