I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
