a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
