WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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