After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
