the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
