Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
