I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
