we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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