dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
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