Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
