I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
