lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
