it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
