So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
