I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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