ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
