we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
