I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
