she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I party with great urgency now.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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