The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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