i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
