I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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