did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
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