You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i think my mom watched the whole time
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
