I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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