So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
