Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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