Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
