look no pants
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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