i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
