I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
